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By Satirous Mochsem
LOS ANGELES– Today marks the anniversary of California’s ban on driving-while-talking without a hands-free device.
But one Californian long ago decided to give the law the boot.
After being pulled over twice for talking on her custom gold and diamond studded Motorola RAZR, Maria Garcia Perez y Diaz de Arroyo decided to take a stand.
“Daddy had this phone made for me special, and I love it. I wouldn’t be caught dead with one of those Bluetooth thingies in my ear – but I knew I couldn’t survive without talking on the phone and driving,” said Garcia Perez y Diaz de Arroyo.
Armed with freakish flexibility from years of Pilates classes, Garcia Perez y Diaz de Arroyo decided earlier this year that she would redefine the meaning of hands-free.
“I can wrap my feet around the back of my head, so I got the idea to hold my phone up with my foot. Then I asked Daddy’s lawyers to look into it — and it’s totally legit. There’s nothing in there about not using your foot.”
With some practice, Garcia Perez y Diaz de Arroyo was soon back to her favorite pastime of talking while driving.
With eyes forward, two hands on the wheel, and a foot to her ear, she was again cruising the streets of Beverly Hills while chatting it up – this time fully legal.
Despite continued hassling by the boys in blue, she remained undeterred. “I got pulled over like four more times because [the police officers] thought I was talking with my hand. Each time I just held my phone up to my head for them, and they didn’t give me a ticket.”
“I even showed one cop how I could wrap both my legs behind me. He was sweet. He left me his number on a slip from his ticket book.”